I couldn’t breath today,
Knowing I’d break your heart today.
And if I’m being honest, I’d say,
I broke my own heart this way.
I don’t want to lose you,
And the way you make me feel.
Something’s just not right,
Your heart’s not mine to steal.
Maybe I’m making a mistake,
By telling you to leave.
And maybe I’ll come back,
You can have me if you please.
But maybe my gut is right,
And you were always just a friend.
I can’t tell the difference,
For your sake, this is the end.
Is my pain selfish, is it fear?
Let a good one go in search of better.
I don’t want you to disappear,
So I’m writing you a letter.
Imagine what your friends will think,
I hope that they don’t hate me.
Hold myself up on the cold porcelain sink,
I can’t stand for you to hate me.
Things started right, but don’t they always?
Hours in galleries staring at the art,
Goodnight kisses in the hallways,
Couldn’t bear to part.
The clouds are puking buckets of rain,
And I’m thinking of how your voice cracked in pain.
I don’t know if I did the right thing,
Is it supposed to hurt like this if it was just a fling?
I heard you strum on your guitar,
Goodbye blue skies, hello new scar.
I know you enough to see your pain,
Echoes within me as your fingers strain,
Against the strings, against the wood,
I’d take it away if I could.
We’re just two fish,
But the ocean is vast,
And we moved too fast.
I can still smell you on my clothes.
Leaned up to kiss you on my toes.
Are you thinking of me today?
The sun is gone, clouds are here to stay.
Can’t play this Taylor and not think of you,
Your sweet nothings and the things you do.
I wish I was what you deserved,
I wish I was, a song perverse.